Turks are Orcs

This guy had it coming. He criticized Lord of the Rings as being racist. What followed was 188 people telling and shouting him that he is an idiot. It seems like criticizing LOTR is an easy way of getting traffic -and these days you can't get enough of it- so I will give it a shot.

Here is my pet theory: Orcs are Turks - or Mongols for that matter. "Evil" in LOTR is oriental. Before you post a comment on how idiotic this claim is -I am hoping to beat the frenchman- please give me a second to explain why.

Disclaimers first - Etymology of the word "orc" has nothing to do with Turks. The word is from old English meaning demon, which in turn was borrowed from Latin "Orcus"- the god of the Underworld. However Tolkien's Orcs and Beowulf's Orcs are very different. Tolkien just used the word but loaded it with a new meaning.

Second, I do not think that Orcs are Blacks. This comes up often- especially in United States- but I believe what is happening is people are feeling the white racism and immediately identify the victims as blacks. It does not help that sometimes orcs are defined as dark skinned either. Fortunately for my case, the similarity stops there. We have, on the other hand, a long list of supporting evidence for the case of Orcs are Turks - and Turks can be quite dark skinned.

Finally, I am not here to blame Tolkien with racism or start a flame war. It is possible to find certain level of interracial mistrust in any human - it is in our biology. LOTR is a great book and in LOTR there are many passages where the racial mistrust itself is attacked. However as much as Turks were the "others" for Europe, the Orcs were the others for Dunedain - a race with no hope of reconciliation.

Now let's move to the more interesting part - why orcs must be turks.

The first cues are geographical. Dunedain means "men of the west" literally. And a figure of Europe is unmistakable in LOTR. Orcs are on the east, south east more precisely -and they are not "European".

Dunedain and Elves are fair skinned, graceful. Orcs are short and robust and bow legged. They are a "horde" and wolf-riders.

Orcs use scimitars and spears. Quoting from wikipedia entry for scimitar: "The name can be used to refer to almost any Middle Eastern or South Asian sword with a curved blade. They include Arabic saif, Indian talwar, Persian shamshir, and Turkish kilij and yatağan, among others. These blades all were developed from the ubiquitous parent sword, the Turko-Mongol saber."

It is not clear what Orcs used as bows in Tolkien - I did quite a bit of research and could not find it. There is one passage where orcs carry yew self bows, but what is described in other parts are very different and sounds suspiciously like short composite bows. Apparently Peter Jackson also thinks like me, so the Orcs in the LOTR movies use composite short bows. The very bows that made Turks and Mongols the dominant horse archers for almost a millenium. The bows of the dunedain and elves, on the other hand, are English longbows and selfbows.

Orcs are strong and war-like. They are organized in a one-man structure as opposed to feudal, many kingdom structure of the elves, dwarves and hobbits. They are heretics, followers of Morgoth ( which I believe to be Muhammed- this would make perfect sense for the Catholic Tolkien). Their leaders are called Sauron and Saruman - suspicously sounding similar to Ottoman Sultan Suleyman. My favourite is the "evil eye in the southeast" - are you kidding me?

The idea of the Dunedain - once powerful and united, now divided into nation-states- is very similar to Roman Empire- which again is very convenient for Roman-Catholic Tolkien.

Battle of the Pelennor Fields and Battle of Vienna - which signalled the point where the Ottoman expansion into Europe was stopped- are very similar. The holy league relief forces - mainly cavalry strikes the sieging army from the flanks - a decisive blow. They are so similar that it is impossible to dissmis it as similarity. I strongly believe Tolkien was inspired by the Battle of Vienna.

There are many different fine points - but I believe you got my point. You can now go back and read LOTR once again, this time with my glasses or post a comment on how stupid I am. The choice is yours.